


bittersweet

by ohdeeraki (alphamethyst)



Category: Goyo: Ang Batang Heneral (2018)
Genre: Angst, CHILDHOOD gRECENTE FUCKERS!, Childhood Friends, Dead Goyo, Ghost Goyo, Heartbreak, Illustrated, M/M, Multi, Pining, Polyamory
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-16
Updated: 2018-12-16
Packaged: 2019-09-20 07:16:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,151
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17018178
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alphamethyst/pseuds/ohdeeraki
Summary: Goyo likes his childhood friend, but he never told him.Goyo is polyamorous, but the world does not allow that.Goyo wants to hold his best friend's hand, but things are just different now.a series of short stories about goyo's heartbreak, pining, and polyamory.(( or: the whole goyo angst zine i made))





	bittersweet

**Author's Note:**

> i have no fucking clue how to use ao3 this is the first time i used this in forever so idk how to put my art here,,ITS 12:30 AM IM UPLAODING THIS AFTER THE GOYO DVD RELEASE. ENJOY MY ANGST GOODNIGHT
> 
> also tahnk you to the wonderful @PrinsipeNgPoot and @trickscd for beta-ing _(:3)

**_i. promise_ **

**__ **

There is a tree in Bulacan that has “G” and V” carved on the bark. The letters are engraved crudely—obviously Goyo’s doing. Goyo is not a meticulous person. He is spontaneous, and the carving just shows it (along with his two broken ribs after he climbs this tree).

He made a bet with Vicente. If he managed to climb this tree without falling, they could be together forever.

“Why would we need a tree to find out if we could be together until we grow old? Why couldn’t we just…be together?”

Goyo didn’t know the answer to that either. Maybe it was because—

He knew deep inside he couldn’t keep that promise.

He was unfaithful, that he knows. It was embarrassing that there was already a saying to prove this.

_Huwag kang magpapa-goyo._

Vicente knew this as well. That was why he was willing to borrow a knife in the kitchen to carve these letters on the tree. To immortalize their friendship--or was it really friendship? The way his heart beat as if he and Vicente played a game of _langit, lupa_ convinced him otherwise.

Vicente was kind. Vicente was gentle. Vicente didn’t deserve to get hurt whenever Goyo courted another woman.

Bones and promises weren’t the only thing broken whenever Vicente saw Goyo flirting with another girl.

Maybe that was why he fell off the tree. He already knew that they weren’t meant to be together forever.

 

**_ii. look_ **

**__ **

At first, Vicente actually hoped Goyo would climb the tree. Maybe then he wouldn’t be so guilty in hoping they would share a future together.

Was it really bad to hope for their friendship to turn into something more? Or would everything he hoped for would just turn into empty promises leaving him alone in the end?

Even though Vicente would always tell Goyo to go for it, get the girl, there’s no way she wouldn’t fall for you—there was always this bitterness that stayed with him as he said those words every time Goyo wanted to court someone else.

Even though Vicente was the one who told Goyo to take the girl stargazing, and lie on the grass and count how many stars they could count, Vicente’s heart would always sting.

That was why he both felt shitty and relieved whenever he dumps one girl from another, maybe hoping that Goyo’s eyes would look into his in the end.

 

(What Enteng didn’t know that Goyo already has— _always_ has looked at Enteng. He was just too scared to show it.)

 

**_iii. stay_ **

 

Vicente was there when Goyo experienced his first heart break.

It wasn’t because of a girl, since Goyo was the one who usually broke hearts. Rather, it was because his dog ran away.

It was stormy when the puppy fled. Lightning and thunder scared it, so it took off. The two went searching for the dog until it became dark.

They never found it.

Goyo cried on Vicente’s neck. He wiped his tears there, despite Vicente being ticklish, he allowed Goyo to stay like that. It hurt Vicente to see him this way.

“Would you leave me too?” Goyo asked through his sobs.

Vicente only replied with an embrace. It was tight, and his arms got trapped between their torsos, so he wrapped his arms around Vicente’s neck.

“Never.” Vicente whispered.

Upon hearing that, Goyo realized that Vicente really would never leave his side.

This happened years ago.

Goyo remembers this because the way Enteng looks right now is similar to the way Enteng looked at him before.

Enteng with the kind eyes. Enteng with the warm smile. Enteng with the gentle hands.

The only difference between then and now is that—

Enteng is holding Joven’s hand and looking at Joven’s eyes. Not Goyo’s.

 

**_iv. poly_ **

 

Goyo once believed that there were too many pieces of his heart. And those pieces were meant to be given to anyone he found a connection with. It was like giving away puzzle pieces to other people, or like giving secret clues written on little papers that led to a treasure chest. But that would mean the puzzle would create an image of his heart, and the secret clues would lead to him.

How narcissistic.

But Goyo knows two things.

One: he falls in love easily.

Two: his true loves are Ilyong and Enteng.

They were his best friends. They were polar opposites.

Enteng was the kind to help Goyo up when he falls off the horse. Ilyong was the kind to laugh at his stupidity.

Enteng’s laugh was warm, like he’s promising to take care of you. Ilyong’s was mocking—and yet affectionate all the same, as he tried hard to hide it.

It fucked Goyo up that eventually he would have to choose between the two in the future.

You can only choose one, you can’t have both, Goyo. You can only marry one person, not two, Goyo. You can only look in one direction, not the other, and eventually spend a life with only one of them, not the other, Goyo.

That’s how the world works, but not his mind. He has two hands and too many pieces of his heart to give. But Goyo knows that Enteng and Ilyong already completed the puzzle piece.

 

**_v. here lies goyo_ **

It was like a wind struck his entire body when Goyo died. Not because of the bullet that went through his mouth, but because his soul was ripped out of his body abruptly. And just like that, he watched his body collapse on the ground, face first.

He couldn’t feel anything. He didn’t know if it was because ghosts can’t feel, or if it was because he didn’t really give a fuck that he was dead.

Then, when his best friend came to view, and cradled his dead body—that’s when the pain hits. Maybe it was the phantom pain of the bullet that shot his mouth. A likely explanation was his heart breaking into pieces, when he saw Vicente cup his cheek.

The pain he felt reminded him of the time he fell off the tree Vicente and he tried to climb when they were stupid teenagers. He remembered a promise. If he climbed the highest branch of the tree without falling, he and Vicente would be together forever.

He fell and broke a rib. Maybe he broke more ribs because he remembered Vicente punching him for being so stupid. And for believing they would be together forever. He remembered Vicente’s embrace, his chest ached both because of the fall and because Vicente thinks they would be separated eventually.

If Goyo’s heart was broken from seeing Vicente cry over him, then he didn’t want to imagine what Vicente was feeling right now.

“The General is dead!” He hears Carrasco warn the other soldiers.

Enteng, run. Enteng, stop crying.

Enteng, I love you too.

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> im very new at writing ,,im not a writer honestly so it means a heck ton for u reading this _(:3) constructive criticisms are welcome!
> 
> pwease tell me what u think by commenting below i wuv u <3


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